The first Pirates of the Caribbean film was one of the first movies I had ever seen in a movie theatre. When I saw this movie as a child, I was blown away. Whether it was the high sweeping action or the incredibly memorable characters, “The Curse of the Black Pearl” quickly became on of my childhood favorites. I’ve gone back and watched the move again and it still holds up really well. Sadly, the sequels to the first movie are a different story. Other than “Dead Man’s Chest” which despite having some weak aspects I would still argue is a good movie, the other films in this franchise have resulted in less than mediocre results to say the least. Whether it was the incredibly bloated and tonally inconsistent “At Worlds End” or the extremely unmemorable and boring “On Stranger Tides”, the quality of this franchise has been steadily dropping. After a six year wait from the last movie and the hiring of a new director, “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales” was going to have try something new and different in order to keep this franchise relevant. Sadly though, while not being as bad as the last two movies, “Dead Men Tell No Tales” adds nothing new to these movies and just presents the same old formula that we have seen for four movies.

“Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales” is set five years after “On Stranger Tides” and opens with Henry Turner, the son of Will Turner played by Brenton Thwaites, trying to find the Trident of Poseidon in order to bring his father back from the sea. Along his journey, he meets the ghost Captain Salazar, played by Javier Bardem who is one of the few bright spots of this movie. Salazar is looking for revenge against Captain Jack Sparrow for being responsible for his death, and tells Henry to deliver a message to him. Meanwhile, a young woman named Carina Smith, played by Kaya Scoledario, has been sentenced to death due to her knowledge of astronomy being construed as witchcraft. While she tries to escape, she runs into Jack, who is trying to pull off a robbery. The best way to describe this movie is tired. Not that watching this movie will tire you, more like the movie literally feels tired. The story goes exactly where you would predict it would go. Jack is in trouble, Jack gets captured, Jack escapes near death through the help of his crew and a new female lead, Jack sets out to find a mystical item with his new companions, the villain catches up to Jack, Jack narrowly escapes and so on and so on. Oh, and Barbossa is once again shoe horned into this movie. he serves more of purpose then he did in the last one, but he still isn’t that necessary. The characters them self are also feel tired. I already mentioned that Barbossa felt unnecessary to this movie, but the character of Jack Sparrow has also completely worn out his charm. In the first couple movies, Jack was an amazing character to watch due to him being an idiot that was oozing with charm due to Depp’s stellar performance. But now, he has basically become parody of himself by doing stupid things just because. I can tell that Depp still has fun playing the character, but it’s a shame that such lazy writing has ruined such a fantastic character. Henry and Carina were basically this movie’s Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan and while Scoledario adds a sense of character to her part that makes stand out from the rest of the cast, Thwaites does nothing to make Henry a poor retread of his father. It was announced that this movie would be bringing back certain cast members, but they leave such little impact that it’s hardly worth even mentioning.

Throughout this entire movie, not a single original idea is shown. Save for one segment, every scene of this movie feels like a “been there done that” sort of deal. That one segment I mentioned is flashback scene where witness Jack becoming a pirate captain and why Salazar wants him dead. This was easily the best scene in the movie because not only was it something new, it gave good motivation for the character of Salazar to hunt down Jack. Other than that, no new thoughts to be seen. Every idea this movie tries to present is just an altered idea from the last four movies. The scene where we are introduced to Jack Sparrow is just a more over the top version of the cannibal scene from Dead Man’s Chest. The climax of this movie is pretty much the same as the climax to “At Worlds End”, just in a new environment. Even the effects on the ghost pirates, while not looking bad by any means, just seem like reused designs from the last four movies and the design of Salazar doesn’t look nearly as appealing as the design for Davy Jones was. Luckily Bardem is such a good actor that he can still act beyond an average design to still make his character interesting. This movie tries to throw a million set pieces at you and I don’y your going to remember any of them after a week or so. It evens tries to throw in a useless character twist which thankfully it doesn’t focus on for to long. Despite the last two movie being awful, they at least at certain visions which I can describe to you in detail. For this movie, the only vision I can see is ctrl-c and ctrl-v.

“Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales” is the definition of going through the motions. It doesn’t try to present any new ideas and just ends up seeming like a cash cow, which is what many movies in the franchise have ended up seeming like. The movie isn’t terrible per say, but it’s not very good either. Despite being directed Joachim Ronning and Espin Sandberg, the movie still feels like Verbinski is at the helm and doesn’t have any clear vision for itself. If this franchise wants to stay relevant, it’s going to have try and reinvent itself. And judging by the end of this movie. it seems like were going to the exact same place we’ve place we’ve gone to in the last four movies. In the end, “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales” is a forgettable movie that adds nothing we’ve haven’t seen before. if you’ve liked all the the other Pirates movies, I don’t why this one would be the one to turn you away. But if you have become bored this series, then this movie will keep that boat sinking and for that reason, I can’t recommend seeing it in theatres.